In a few years, the pain that you feel now will be forgotten. You can save yourself from the pain by moving on slowly and enjoying life to the fullest.
You can have a better life and meet more quality women. You can invest more time in your career, learn new skills, and travel more.
Because you are not able to be with one woman at a time, it is impossible to connect. You must reinvent yourself to become the man you were meant to be.
Don’t chase people. Be yourself, do what you want and work hard. You will find the right people to be in your life and they will stay. But right now, it is all about rebuilding your life.
The Non Negotiable
These non-negotiables can be broken while you’re still recovering from a breakup, no matter how long ago or last week. This will make it more difficult for you to fully recover and slow down the healing process.
These non-negotiables will help you feel great and prevent you from falling into depression. Because depression can make it impossible to function as a human being. You will feel more depression from the pain of the breakup. But, it is also because you are not doing these things.
To recover from the breakup, you must put yourself in the best possible condition so that you can rebuild your strength.
To increase your testosterone levels, you should lift heavy weights at least three times per week. Vasopressin, a chemical that is responsible for attachment in the brain, is reduced by testosterone. Your body releases serotonin, the happy chemical, and vasopressin, the attachment chemical, to signal your body that you are having sex with a woman. This is because your body knows this will result in procreation.
Your body will produce more testosterone if you have less vasopressin. This means that you will feel less chemically attached to your ex.
You can also increase your testosterone by lifting heavier weights such as deadlifts, bench presses, and squats. These workouts don’t require you to be the strongest guy in the gym. Just do what you can and slowly add weight.
Exercise releases dopamine and endorphins in the brain, which makes you feel good. Keep active and your body will supply all the neurotransmitters it needs to remain mentally and emotionally healthy.
Healthy eating habits are important. Unhealthy eating can lead to a feeling of fatigue, sluggishness, and depression.
Increase your intake of chicken, turkey, fish, and other vegetables. Two green smoothies are recommended: one in the morning and one in the evening. Each one contains 1 banana, 5 strawberries and a handful of spinach or kale, as well as two carrots and four ice cubes.
Get at least 8 glasses of water each day. Your brain tissue is made up 85% water. If you don’t give your brain the nutrients it needs, your body will be in a poor state.
To fully recover and perform at your best, you need to get 7-8 hours of sleep. Depression can be diagnosed if you don’t sleep enough or are constantly awake. Depression can lead to a breakdown. You must combat this by getting enough sleep.
Turn off your phone and TV by midnight, get off social media. Instead, read a book, write a journal and listen to soothing music.
Use no alcohol or drugs to solve the problem. While alcohol and drugs can temporarily provide temporary relief for some hours, they have very negative side effects on your mental health. While I don’t say you shouldn’t drink, you’ll find yourself in a fragile mental state after a breakup. Drugs and alcohol will only increase the pain and cause you to make poor decisions that you’ll regret once you get sober.
Many drugs and alcohol are depressants that can lead to depression chemically. This is something we want to avoid.
This is not about removing alcohol from your life, but instead of trying to cover it up, you must face the problem head-on.
Avoid alcohol and drugs for at least 90 days following a breakup. Depending on how long the relationship lasted, you may need to stay away for up to 6 months.
Keep Social: Try to get out of your home at least once a week. Go outside at least two to three times per Semaine and get out into the open. You create the perfect environment to encourage depression by staying in your own home.
Staying busy is key to getting over a breakup. You can’t dwell on the loss of one person if you have a life you love.
If it happens within the first week after your split, I can understand why you want to stay in your home. After that, you should get out of your home and start to explore the world. Get in touch with your family and friends or use meetup.com to attend a few events each week.
If you don’t take good care of your body and mind, you will not be able to heal from a serious breakup. If you don’t break these non-negotiables, the pain from the breakup will last longer.
The Weekly Plan
You will also need to make a weekly plan using the information above. You keep it in your phone, on a piece paper, or on your computer. It is something you will use every day.
This is what I wrote on a piece of paper near my bed. It was the first thing I read when I woke up in the morning.
- Gym: Exercise 5x per week to reach 175 lbs. Swim, run, hike, and meditate daily.
- Healthy eating: Green smoothies, more protein, and more vegetables, no junk food.
- Build knowledgeformen.com for your business 10 hours per day
- Participate every week in a mastermind group by joining a mastermind group
- Toastmasters is a place to get involved every week
- At least one meetup.com event should be attended each week
- Every week, make new friends.
- Read personal development, entrepreneurship, success books every day
- Write down five things that you are grateful for each morning at 7 am
- Never walk past a woman you find attractive, but say “hi” to every girl that interests you.
It is possible to create five to ten things you want to live by each day. If you stick to your plan, you will start to see amazing things happen in your life.
Porn and masturbation
This is a period when men don’t have a sexual life. I encourage mild porn and masturbation, not rebound sex with other women or to have one-night stands.
This is especially true for someone who has just been through a breakup.
Although this is not a time when I would recommend masturbation or porn to a man, it’s almost like giving CPR. It’s worth taking the risk to save someone’s life by breaking their ribs.
I would prefer you to masturbate at home with porn than go out and drink and maybe sleep with someone else. This is a temporary fix or cover-up of the real problem. You, her or an STD could be more severe if you sleep with them.
Masturbation and porn can decrease the desire to have sex with women. The best thing you can do right now is to feel the pain, to self-reflect, and to start the healing process.
For the first three months, masturbating and watching porn should be limited to one per day. If necessary, increase it to every other day and gradually decrease it thereafter.
I don’t want to encourage you to become addicted to masturbation and porn. However, I don’t think it is wrong to have an urge to do so after a breakup.
In a later section, we’ll discuss getting back into dating.
This is the right time to reach out and support your family members and friends. Let your family know that you are experiencing a difficult time and ask them to support you at least once per week for 3 months.
Reach out to the people you care about. Be open, honest, and vulnerable about what’s going on.
This is not something you can do on your own. You will need to have the support of people who care about you. As men, we often think we can handle this on our own. However, a split is a serious problem. You will recover faster if you have the support of others.
To get the support and help you need, share your feelings with people who care about you.
Do not build a wall around yourself to keep others from supporting you. Accept that you are hurting and then open your arms to receiving support.
If you are still crying on the sofa or experiencing severe pain after one year, you might consider seeking professional help such as a counselor or therapy to provide ongoing support.
Don’t be afraid to seek professional or family support.
Human emotions are normal and you can feel them. A breakup is extremely painful for both men and women.
Write down all your feelings about your ex.
What happened to the relationship?
Which incidents are you replaying in your mind?
“If I had done only this …” those stories.
What sequence of events caused the split?
Did you see any of these events in the beginning?
If you had the chance to talk to your ex, what would you tell her right now?
You can send it to her on one page or in a whole notebook. It is only for you.
This is the best place to vent all your feelings about the relationship. I want you come to an understanding and forgiveness place for everything that happened.
“I was happy to share a portion of my life with your, and I learned much about myself. But now it’s time for me to move on and start a new chapter in my life.”
This letter is not required to be sent to your partner. It is impossible to change what has already happened. This letter is for you to reflect on yourself and your relationship.
You are only opening the wound and adding salt to it if you hand the letter to your partner. Let it heal. You don’t have to think that you will get it back together.
It was a relationship that ended, now it is time to move on.
When you’re done with your letter, I ask you to take out the notebook or paper.
The act of burning a letter signifies the release and the beginning of a new chapter in your life.
It is an emotional experience that should not be forgotten. However, it is necessary to do this as part of your journey to recovery.
This allows you to accept the past and create a new space for possibilities.
Stepping Into Abundance
You need to realize that you are not alone in finding attractive women who are close to you. While you don’t need to get back into dating, you should know that there are many women who are attracted and interested in you.
You are not the only one who will be attractive to your ex. Many other women are equally attractive if they are not already.
You can visit tinder every week to see all the beautiful women in your area. It doesn’t matter if you are interested in dating, but it is worth checking out how many women live within 10 miles of your home.
You can also create a list of 25 gorgeous women you like. These women are not porn stars or Victoria’s Secret models. They are simply beautiful women you like. It is good to know there are many women in your local area that you find attractive.
It was very comforting to open the document, scroll through it and see all the beautiful women I’d chosen for it. It made me realize that there are many beautiful women out there, and I wanted to be the man these women desire to be with.
This is what you should be aiming at.
How to channel your anger in the right way
You can feel angry when you break up. What made her do that or that? Why does she move so fast? Is it because she is smiling with another man in the photo?
You can either let anger control your life in a negative manner or use it as fuel to rebuild your life.
You have the freedom to choose.
This could either be a benefit or a disadvantage.
You have the freedom to choose.
Look at your anger and pain from the breakup as a way to reinvent yourself and create the life you desire.
You will be able to recover faster if you don’t view the split as a negative or a setback in your life.
In Japanese, “crisis” means danger + chance.
Many men become blinded by danger and miss the real opportunity that a split presents.
If you are willing to look for the good in a relationship, there are many things you can learn from it.
Instead of getting angry and drowning yourself in drugs, alcohol, or excessive porn, masturbation,
Write down the goals you wish to achieve and then take action.
You can be relentless in the pursuit of your goals and become a huge action-taker. You get results by taking action. The more you get results the more you will be addicted to them.
Let’s suppose you want to be in the best shape possible. Instead of blaming your ex, run, visit the gym or buy healthy food supplements. Your anger can be channeled towards your goals.
You might also want financial freedom. To do this, you should read the best books about business, sales, and marketing. Start taking medication each day to build your business and do the work you need.
If you could have completely recovered from the breakup and channeled your anger towards your goals and were in the best shape of life, then that would make it all worth it.
It is important to stop trying to hide the pain and start to do positive things to rebuild your life.
Rebuild Your Life
Hobbies: After a divorce, get out as much as you can. What hobbies have you given up? What hobbies would you like to try? Begin these hobbies and find people who share your interests.
You are asked to think of 3 hobbies you enjoyed doing in your past or would like to do again. Then, commit to these hobbies regularly.
Goals: Write down one major goal for each area of your life, and then commit to it.
- Personal Growth
Ask yourself: “What is the first step to reaching each goal?”
Friends: Choose 5 friends you want to reconnect with or have lost touch. Losing friends from your girlfriend’s social circle
I would like you to call each of these friends and arrange a coffee/lunch/fun date. Spend time with your friend at least once per month after the fun outing.
Family: Name 5 relatives that you are looking to reconnect with or have lost touch.
Now I would like you to call each of them and tell them what you are doing. Then, schedule a coffee/lunch/fun event with them. Spend time with the family member after the outing at least once per month.
Take care of yourself. List five things you can do for yourself.
You can do these things: get a massage, meditate, read, travel, take a personal development course or coach your life, talk to a mentor, buy new clothes.
I urge you to do the following 5 things for yourself each month. Since you don’t have to spend it on your ex anymore, now you can use that extra money to take care of yourself. This is crucial for your recovery.
Kaizen: Kaizen means “to improve oneself every day” in Japanese. Each day I want you to go to bed smarter than the day before and closer to your goals. As a man, you will become more powerful the more you grow and improve.
You must realize that the end of a relationship is an opportunity to reinvent yourself and reach your goals.
This is how you can feel your pain and make amazing things happen in your own life.
Find Your Purpose
Find your true self and discover what speaks to you the most. It will help you to find your purpose and push you in the right direction.
- What is it that makes you feel alive?
- What activities can cause you to lose track of your time?
- What would regret you not doing, being, or having in your life?
- What would you do if money was not an object?
You can only reconnect with your purpose when you are focused on this “one thing.” This is one of the best ways to heal from a split. You are completely absorbed in the task and don’t think about losing this person.
You will find that there is no time for you to think about them. Instead, you are focused on your purpose and your path in life and what you need to do with your life.
You will forget about your ex and realize that you were holding yourself back from realizing your true purpose in life.
This was meant to end so you could do the “thing” you’ve always wanted and be the man you were made to be.
What to do if she comes back to you
If you stop making contact and work on improving your life, it is likely that she will be attracted to you once again. You may be able to show her that things are going well and that you have made big changes in your professional and personal lives.
These are signs that a man is not dependent, clingy, or jealous and is on his way to achieving his purpose and path in life.
This is very appealing.
Don’t do these things in the hope that someone else will follow you. No matter what, you will improve your life for the better.
If she does return to you, however, don’t let your focus shift from your purpose and your improvement on your life to the girl. You shouldn’t be trying to “get” the girl, or get her back.
Keep doing the same thing. If you feel that talking with her is worth your time, energy, and effort, then talk to her. But don’t get too excited about talking to her again.
Keep going with the same course, even if she comes along, but don’t chase after her.
After gaining more clarity and self-reflection, you can decide that ending the relationship was the right thing to do. If you feel that it is, and you believe you should be apart, you can respectfully decline her invitation to visit you.
Keep doing what’s right because it’s effective.
Getting Back Into Dating
If you’ve completed these activities and are starting to notice a desire for other women, it might be time to start dating.
This is an important part of fully healing from a breakup. If a man can’t successfully date another woman or settles for women below his standard (or his ex-girlfriend), he will feel like he has already had the best woman possible and has lost her.
This can often cause a man to try to make things work again with his ex-girlfriend, even though he has done all the work.
It is important to realize that you can date any woman you like, even if your ex-girlfriend was not the one you love.
You will love and feel loved again.
To date high-quality women, you must be a man of high quality. This is done by getting rid of all neediness, clinginess, jealousy, and becoming an individual of value.
If you improve all aspects of your life, including your health, wealth, relationships, and personal growth, then you’re living your true purpose.
You are very attractive.
This man I call The Grounded Man.
A man who is determined and pursues his goals with all of his might.
My Amazon bestseller The Dating Book for Men is a proven 7-Step System to Master Your Relationship Life.
This book is a step-by-step guide that will show you how to attract and love the women you desire.
I want men to wake up and pursue what is important in their lives. You can see the difference now, I’m sure.
You only live once so make the most of it.
You can have everything you want. All you have to do is be the person you deserve.
Men reach out to me most when they want to be stronger men. So I created a program to help them become their most powerful selves.
My program, The Awakening, is a three-day intensive men’s retreat that I offer in San Diego.
I assist men to bridge the gap between where they are and where they want to go, as men. I have been doing this for hundreds of men through my intensive live programs.
This has been a difficult journey and I understand that it is not an easy one. Although you are likely still suffering and have reached the end of this guide, it is just a tool to help you on your path to healing. You will need to practice the strategies in this book regularly to recover from a split.
It will not be easy and it will be difficult. There will be nights when you cry and wake up in the middle of the night unable to go back to sleep.
You will have moments in your life that seem meaningless and you feel like you lost it with your ex. But the truth is, you still have your whole life ahead of you.
This guide will help you create a new life.
- You can get in better shape.
- Earn more.
- You can have a better relationship.
- Rebuilding old relationships with family and friends is possible.
- You can rediscover your purpose and live it.
- You can relocate to a better place or city where you want to live.
There is so much you can live for and there are many opportunities for the future if you keep your feet on the ground, get up every time you fall, and continue to work hard.
You will get better over time if you keep going. And you’ll love and be loved again.
You should be focusing on your own personal growth. To improve your life, you must work on yourself. You can increase your worth and be the man you’ve always wanted to be. Be the man women want to chase.
Take a look at every aspect of your life, and work together to make it all worthwhile. You should surround yourself with people of high quality who do amazing things with life. Enjoy a lot of fun and try new things. Get out more and meet new people. Explore the world and take more chances. You will feel more fulfilled and connected to your life.
When you are the right man, you will find the right woman for your life. There are many beautiful women who would love to be with your man. There are many beautiful women out there who would love to be with you. There are women out there who are more qualified than you have ever been.
A beautiful woman will understand you and respect you. She will motivate you, belief in you, support you and push you to be a better man.
You are already dead, so there is nothing you can lose. You have had many close calls in life that could have ended your life. Enjoy your life and be happy to live.
Now is the time to do the work and make the life you desire.